The Romance Test - Valentine's Day
For Valentine's Day I put a simple Romance Test for couples to take when they came in the shop. I have left the test up, since everyday a few more couples want to take it.
I never imagined what a learning experience and healthy exercise it would be for everyone who takes it. I never imagined how much I would learn about couples either.
The questions are pretty simple: 1) Where did you first meet your partner? 2) Where was your first date? 3) Where was your first kiss? 4) Where were you the first time he/she said I love you? 5) What is his/her favorite feature of yours? 6) What was he/she wearing when you first met? 7) How long have you been together? 8) What is your anniversary date? 9) When is their birthday? 10) What is his/her favorite song?
My son suggested I take the test down because he thought it was leading to couples arguing. I explained to him, these weren't "arguments," but healthy discovery going on. Like, "you don't know my favorite song? It's (blank)!"
I observed that many times the men could answer questions like "where did you meet?" and "what was she wearing?" better than the women. I observed that once they were "defined as a couple" the women started tracking the details. It's as if that initial interest and connecting was a lot more laborious, victorious, and thus memorable, for the men.
There were couples in their 70s that took the test and scored 100%, and couples newly dating that did the same. There were plenty of young and middle-aged couples who didn't do as well. Ironically, I have not taken the test with my boyfriend. I sadly know that he couldn't answer #5 (favorite feature), nor could I answer it for him. This tells me that we don't spend the time pointing out the little personal things that we care about to one another. #10 (favorite song) would face the same challenge.
I hope those simple ten questions made those partners' day a little more fun, but I hope it also makes them think about the answers, and get to know one another better if they have more to learn. Maybe it is about caring enough to ask the questions, but not about the score if they don't get it right.
I never imagined what a learning experience and healthy exercise it would be for everyone who takes it. I never imagined how much I would learn about couples either.
The questions are pretty simple: 1) Where did you first meet your partner? 2) Where was your first date? 3) Where was your first kiss? 4) Where were you the first time he/she said I love you? 5) What is his/her favorite feature of yours? 6) What was he/she wearing when you first met? 7) How long have you been together? 8) What is your anniversary date? 9) When is their birthday? 10) What is his/her favorite song?
My son suggested I take the test down because he thought it was leading to couples arguing. I explained to him, these weren't "arguments," but healthy discovery going on. Like, "you don't know my favorite song? It's (blank)!"
I observed that many times the men could answer questions like "where did you meet?" and "what was she wearing?" better than the women. I observed that once they were "defined as a couple" the women started tracking the details. It's as if that initial interest and connecting was a lot more laborious, victorious, and thus memorable, for the men.
There were couples in their 70s that took the test and scored 100%, and couples newly dating that did the same. There were plenty of young and middle-aged couples who didn't do as well. Ironically, I have not taken the test with my boyfriend. I sadly know that he couldn't answer #5 (favorite feature), nor could I answer it for him. This tells me that we don't spend the time pointing out the little personal things that we care about to one another. #10 (favorite song) would face the same challenge.
I hope those simple ten questions made those partners' day a little more fun, but I hope it also makes them think about the answers, and get to know one another better if they have more to learn. Maybe it is about caring enough to ask the questions, but not about the score if they don't get it right.
posted by Dina DiNucci at
11:18 PM
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